Let’s talk a bit about me, or better yet said, the Latino Man. It’s common to associate the Latino man with many things that well, most individuals would consider inappropriate, demining or well…out right worthy of a third world country and many would have it.
Now, when people think or see a Latino man they immediately associate it with drinking, gang, violence, illegal immigrants, 5 or more people living in one bedroom apartments, not paying taxes, food stamps, and a whole sleuth of other things I am sure people could come up with. You know, bean-er comes to mind and it’s really sad to think that as people we can’t get past certain things or that we immediately think that everyone is the same. Yah I know that Latinos are not the only minority getting it in the rear, but since I am Latino, I guess I could give my perspective on Latinos a little better than trying to see how other minorities think and feel.
The thing is that growing up, as many Latinos have seen, is tough, simply because of being Latino. Doors are automatically closed on you for certain things, teachers, counselors, and other educational figures label you simply because of being Latino…yah educational people. And starting from school and trying to work your self up in this already tough world, carrying a heavy label of “Latino” makes things even harder and for many simply not worth it and heck, they veer off to doing things that Latinos are labeled to do. So many yah we can brush off the “Latino” label and maybe yah we have to work just a bit harder to get that promotion, or get that position on the football team…heck…going t a job interview…sometimes being short and dark skinned is an issue. Yah, that should not be the case, but we all know the truth.
The thing is growing up , yes I had to work a little harder, maybe not so much because of the color of my skin, but because I come from a single parent family, and that being my mother. She of course had to work two jobs to put food on the table and clothing on my back, so she wasn’t around to help me with my Homework, class projects and to see me play a sport….I was pretty much all alone while in school. I also had to learn about friendship, girls and heck puberty and believe me there are certain thing sin a boys life that need to be addressed and I don’t mean by your peers. So, maybe being dark skin wasn’t the complete issue, but more of my growing up alone. Yet, I still experienced discrimination in restaurants, job interviews etc. I mean I went for a stock Broker Position and was challenging….the office…seriously looked like a sea of white collars workers. Yet I went to apply for a cooking position and BAM, when can I start was their question.
Now, I have seen a lot for my ripe young age 40, not just because I had to, but because I wanted to. I did and tried ever business (Infomercial) that as out there, from placing little ads in hundreds of newspapers to flipping notes, to a vending machine route; the list goes on. But in all my searches I learned something form each experience, which was a positive thing for me, since I was able to flush out the false-hood gimmicks and find the things that worked. But wait not only in business, but in all aspects of my life…I was more in tuned with people, all types of people. You see through out all those attempts at making money online or by following the footsteps that others did, I learned that every single time it was the same exact business scheme, they simply changed the face, the name and switched a few words around…the only thing you were doing is buying what you already bought 3 years ago. The thing is that…every day there is someone born…so they need fresh faces, new and hip names and bam they are selling the same idea.
I don’t care what anyone says…they are the same thing… seen infomercial after infomercial. Now, the thing is, if you look closely at all of it…you’ll find that there are certain business that will work…but they are not quick rich schemes…they take time, patience and most importantly Persistency. And thy will provide residual income – with time.
Now, the thing is that as a Latino, many of us live in that label and we simply believe that good things are only for whites or the majority…yah…it has been drilled into our minds from childhood. We don’t want to try anything and for those few that surpass that mentality, we can get through, but of course it is still tougher but we get through those labels, build and before you know it you’ll be where you really want to be.
I remember when I was 25, and clubbing, yah…clubbing. When I started talking to a lady, the first question from them was, “was I married.” And when I told them no, they would follow with, “How many kids did I have.” And when I said none, they would look surprised and asked if I was, “Gay”. They expected me to be married or divorced with kids. Now the same thing would happen when they would asked what I did for a living, and when I told them they would simply laugh and not believe me…some would walk away or turn around and there were a few, that were drunk…lol…that wouldn’t care…they were there to have fun.
I guess that should be the case when you go out…you simply want to get away from all the drama and relax…have fun…sometimes though people think you are on the hunt…they might be right, but maybe not directly for a relationship…if you know what I mean…lol. The thing is that how people perceive us really does affect a lot on how you perceive yourself and it will eventually affect how you will make choices in life. Life comes at you whatever color your skin is…yah our rocks might be a little bigger, but it’s how you take them on that will provide the final outcome and if you simply take it as being Latino and allow yourself to believe that you are like everyone else…thinks you are…then go ahead, or you can step back and accept your color, make best with what you have and fight a little harder to get what you want or where you would like to be. Maybe reaching for the stars is not the first goal, but reach a little lower, school, the first entry job, and build yourself to that star.
I have seen and dealt with many issues because of being Latino, I have also learned to utilize my gift of two languages. I have learned to not fight with everyone I see, but instead make friends with them and learn everything you can. Don’t judge your peers, colleague, and co-workers, instead judge yourself on how you are moving ahead and what you are doing to get there without stepping on anyone. Yah…sometimes you have to claw your way to the top…but you know what…you can do it with style, professionalism and still…still have the respect from all those you beat to the top. And the best part of doing it with dignity is that you did will enjoy it a lot more.
Being Latino is not easy, being anyone is not easy, but being yourself should be the easiest thing you can be.
I worked hard and I am still working hard, my goal is to retire like my father at age 55…it seems impossible at the moment with the whole economy as we see it now, August 2011. But all we can do is ride the wave and do our best to keep afloat, because financial world doesn’t see the color of your skin, they only see the color of you money. So the rich could get richer, but they can also loose a lot more than the poor.
You know things get associated to each race and it’s unfortunate, and it’s not something new, its being around well for a long time. I mean I married a Latino woman, thinking I should, they are this and they are that. At first I wanted to marry a white women, sounds funny, not sure why, maybe because my first happen to be white and she was pretty awesome…older, gorgeous…oh well…so maybe that’s the reason I thought about it and the funny thing is that I had a whole image on the woman I would marry, long blondish hair, full lips, about 5’ 5” or so, white complexion and I ended up marrying a woman with very short hair, small thin lips, about 5’7”, light brown and well Mexican…funny how things turn out. But experiencing all the relationships I had seen through, I have seen through friends and read articles on and stories on, it all started to look like there was just a lot of drama…with any type of women or man for that matter…so whether I had married a white woman or Mexican, I guess it would not have mattered. I have heard it s sort of difficult to marry into a different culture and sometimes beliefs or life style clash…so either or…at some point everyone is in same boat. I don’t know, I still see it all around me…and sometimes I think it starts all when they are kids…because 2 years and 9 years and 18 years and 40 years all have issues, drama and well heck you can’t get away from it. Look around…the drama you see at work, if you look close enough it almost seems like you were back in High School…hmmm. Anyhow, I have to say that it’s tough all around and we need to brush off what we can and move forward, maybe not necessarily “On”, but “Forward”.
My Perspective:
Don’t label, don’t allow others to label you and if they do, brush it off. Stay your course on what you would like to do with your life and with small steps you will get there…you have to believe. Simply giving into the labeling should not be an option. Yes you will come across huge obstacles, people will put you down, and you will probably hear the word “No” a lot, but you known what, with each no there is a closer chance that a yes will come about and you know what…more than likely it’s the one :”Yes” you have been waiting for. I worked hard in my profession for nearly 20 years…and each company before would not really see or appreciate the potential I had…the company I am with now…truly appreciate what I can do and what I do for the company. I have reach my peak performance I am at my prime…it took me a whole lot of work, sweat, blood and pain, but I am slowly getting there, on course to where I want to be….it isn’t being rich, simply want to live comfortably, and provide my children with the college education they deserve without all the pain I went through. Of course I will teach them humbleness and righteousness, I will do my best to provide them with the tools they will need to be good contributors to society…and guess what I am Latino…I am a man…thanks for reading.
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