Women Having Kids

The other day I was reading Cosmopolitan, yah I was reading Cosmo. Any ways there was an article on women having children and how 1 out of 5 women are now deciding that having children is not as important in a marriage or to them as it was back maybe in 1990’s when it was 1 out of 10 women on the topic of children. Many women are deciding in pursuing their careers or establishing themselves financially first and maybe having children later in their lives, but what’s happening is that later in their lives they are comfortable and content with their lives. Child bearing is not at the top of the list anymore.

Another thing too is that besides not being at the top of the list, the few that decide to go ahead and have children are doing so at a later age than it’s normal to. With today’s medical advances, it is easier for women over 35 or even 40 to have children. But the amount of women doing so has reduced. Now, of course I am not a women, but have been married for a long time and have two children.

Getting there was tough, we had to go through a lot of infertility programs over a span of 5 years, before we finally gave up and bam we had our first child. It wasn’t until my son was 7 when we were surprised with our daughter, not something we were expecting especially after seven years. But we did think about maybe not having kids at one point and trying to get ahead financially and maybe get situated a bit better, then try again. The thing is during that time there was a hesitation in having kids, coming from my significant other, and as she got older she was a bit more nervous and concern health wise, so I guess I did experience some of the feeling or thoughts that many women are having now, specifically through my significant other, but my question is in our instance it was different, so why is it that many women are now having second thoughts on the whole thing about having kids?

Is it really that they wish to move ahead in their career or is it that they cannot find the right partner to move forward with it…yah there are millions of single moms out there doing just find, but it seems that more and more women don’t want to do it alone anymore, not because they can’t simply because they do not want to…they want to share in the upbringing and of course share in the responsibility. It seems now more and more men are getting more involved in raising their children, changing diapers, feeding, hospital visits, school functions, after school sports, etc. it’s not all the women anymore you can begin to see more and more men at these places. So I think that the career thing is not the only reason why there is a jump in women not having kids…1 out of 5…I think there are other variables involved.

My Perspective:
We can read all these articles, studies or whatever we see, but the thing is that you need to look into it further and not take everything you read as strong facts. I think that we as couples participate more, communicate more then we will see an increase of women getting back into the maternity thinking…it’s a strong feeling, child and mother…I just can’t believe that it’s been replaced with Career. Those are my thoughts, thanks for reading, till next time Latino Man signing off till next time.

Be safe, be adventures, find balance between work and life.

Everyday Life Around Us


Another day another dollar, I guess after taxes it is about 60 cents. So it’s been a while since I have just blabbed, most of my topics are on communication, talking, relationships, and well anything to do with couples, strange but that sort of revolves around our lives, you known people talk about working at relationships and it like having a job, others disagree, well you know I think it is like a job, the only difference between relationships is the difficulty of the relationship, like any job. Some jobs are tough, require possibly physical labor and some require lots of mental labor and other require both, well just the same in a relationship it requires either or both.

Yah ok I am going into that tangent again, but my post today is about everyday life and how everything has its ups and downs, even down to the very minutes of your life. Sometimes you find yourself extremely busy with out a break and other times the days seem to drag because of the lack of work. It happens in many aspects of our life, like, if you have children, the first many years of their lives you are the one taking care of them, etc, and then as they grow up they need less and less help from us…well you know what I mean.
In a relationship some relationships seems to function with little work needed and of course there are those that well both people in the relationship are working hard at it and well like life, sometimes it goes smoothly sometimes it doesn’t. I mean it as simply as making a decision on what you will be having for lunch, it can become complicated for some and others just decide as quickly as they would in other things in life. Work, bosses, children I mean if we look at it all we see children play, and some times tease or fight and if you look at your daily interaction with adults it’s almost identical, you play, work together, tease one another, indirectly or directly and of course there our fights or arguments. As children we tend to not be friends with those and as adults we can either get fired, quick or in some occasion it can get worse…fights, deaths etcetera.
I don’t know, it’s very possible I am not making any sense at all, but I am amazed at what you can see and learn if you simply stop, listen and look closely enough at what your day entitles and what your kids day entitles or maybe you remember certain thing of your childhood, teenager years etc., and think wow, is this just like high school…all the drama and headaches that come with growing up. Yet we all know that these things are happening everyday and not only to you but to millions of others and people talk about it, books are written, news is told and now Blogs discuss these exact topics…and yet we do nothing to change how we live our lives or how we can teach our kids to live.

I guess without all the drama we have in this world it would be boring, maybe, but I am certain that a lot of the little things that take up our time and are essentially not worth it…we can do without. I mean we have enough with everything else that we need to deal with the same things we all know about. So stop, and talk to your significant other make things work, if not then MOVE on…seriously. Even if children are involved, if you leave now, then you can show your kids that things can be worked out without anger, violence and still maintain a family or at least have both parents involved in the kids lives without the horribly remorse of all the years of fighting in front of them. Kids can learn that things can be discussed calmly and have a solution.

Crazy I know, but as with anything I could hear millions of excuses…and yet stop and listen…they are the same ones your mother and father made, or your friend or someone you knew or about someone you heard about in the news…its all around you that same excuse and yet you and I still believe it. Change now, it can be done, move forward, lets better ourselves as individuals, let our children learn from our mistakes and not follow them…if we can give them the tools to make better decisions, if you can’t then teach them to be better people with what they have and always strive to learn all they can and be successful in school…the one area that can actually give us a hand up.
This post is just not about relationships, it’s about all the things we do every day, how we handle them, how we solve them. Its not just about communication, its about listening when you need to, talking when you need to and simply being there when you need to. But the one thing is for sure is that we all need to stop making excuses and start making changes, whether they are small, or large, whether they involve you or your partner, family, son, daughter, mother, father…or just you…but we need to start somewhere. I am probably one that makes excuses just like millions of others, but you know I want you to forget everything I just wrote…
Step back, take a look at your life, your kids life if you have kids, your parents lives if they are alive…I mean take a look at your friends lives, coworkers, and you’ll see that there is always something that someone else is going through, that you already know about seeing someone go through it or heard about how others handle it…and yet depending on the circumstance you ask why did they do that? That’s the same thing that happens; it’s like a cycle of never ending issues…same issues that are passed on for generation to generations, and why…it happens. The same things heard over, divorces do to financial, adultery, violence, Car accident do to drunk driving, just because I had one drink, or I could handle my liquor, or a frat party, or well you know what I mean…these things occurred while you were growing up and they are happening while your children grow up, but nothing ever changes. And you what I hear…”Ahh come on let them learn like I did”, or “let them learn the hard way”, or “Ahh that will teach them not to do that again”, are we serious…the cycle never ends.
My Perspective: Can I have one since blabbing away? I don’t know…I could be taking this beyond philosophical…or well…I could be getting carried away, I just can’t believe that life in general and the bad things that happen to us, has been around for hundreds of years and it seems to just be a cycle of life all around us.

Anyways, I’ll stop babbling and take my leave here, till next time, slow down in life, stop and listen and talk you’ll be amazed at what you have been missing and maybe you can change one life. Take care thanks for reading, Latino Man signing off.