What We Are Thinking – Men - Women

Now, here is something I definitely need to touch on, I am sure it’s old news, but it came about while I in the middle of a Blackout of astronomic proportions. After making sure the kids were ok and off to bed, I sat around the table with my sister-n-law and well her sister…and of course the conversation was meaningless, moving from one topic to another, but some how we touch a topic that well can and did cause temperaments to flare.

The discussion started with Bad Boys and why the ladies are always attracted to them, and let me define bad boys in regards to our discussion. These are men that do work, but do not know how to wash clothes, dishes, change a diaper or clean anything around the house for that matter. These are men that stay out late with the boys, bowling, poker, etc. These are men that when they get sick they can’t move to get the remote that is inches away, these are men that, well have these women that do everything for them and most of the time, they are pretty hot…not a requirement, but most of the time it is a characteristic. The thing is that these same women that fall for these so called bad boys, like to complain about them to anyone that is willing to listen. If and when the relationship fails, these women, somehow or other find the same type of man - again.

Now, the other point to this conversation was that had sparks started, that women base their beliefs about all men from these types of men they keep falling for, so they simply state that all men are the same and no one can say different. Now, the conversation went into the beliefs of these men or how they handle family life. Now, lets clarify the position of these men, they are labeled as the provider, the protector, the disciplinary of the family unit, but when it comes down to variables outside their home they seem to loose all common sense. Take for instance; one father will complain about another child, say the other child has a biting issue that needs work. Well that father simply labels the biting child as a “Terrorist” and that there child has no issues, when in fact their child(ren) have issues, one spits at people and the other – well – pinches others. But for some reason those issues are nothing compared to the other child that bites. So they demand closure, by either telling, yes, telling the daycare provider to remove the biting child or they will take their children elsewhere…wait take his spitting and pinching child elsewhere.

So these men, cannot step back as a individual, father included, and instead of abruptly labeling a poor child as a Terrorist and not look at what their children are doing and offer a solution, they instead swing their big wooden cave bats and grunt out demands. But please don’t insult their intelligence about how perfect their kids are. These same men get away with everything and most of the time they are put up with by one women or another…they simply move if they need to. What I believe is that all individuals, whether poor, rich, smart, intelligent, healthy, or physically challenge…want the good things in life. Getting there or having the tools or options to get there differs from person to person…each individual has their own thought process, beliefs, values or – there way of thinking, in a few words.

Of course life would be dull if everyone thought the same way or had the same values, etc., etc., but the core / basic life needs and wants everyone should feel the same way or think the same way…right. We want the good things in life, food over our head, food on the table, and to provide our kids with those things we did not have…make them a better person…even better than us…right. Yah, we are all images of our environment, are upbringing, but is in it at some point of the cycle between child, parent, grandparent a point where someone says, “stop, I need to make a change now and make my child life more productive”. Of course all people are different and have maybe possibly medical or mental issues that affect their thinking or ability to think things through.

The thing is the people I relate to or communicate with are people that I would guess are in their right state of mind, so why are they the ones raising their children to not share, run around the restaurant, yell, bully, and simply not respect anything or anyone…why…because they want to be the cool parents, that everyone wants, you know those that late their kids watch whatever they want on TV, eat whatever they want, stay out as late as they want…heck some parents even think it is ok for their teens to drink, while at home –with their friends…so why…these folks that seems to have a head on their shoulder do and say these things?

After a long winded argument, the final blurt that came from both women was, that nice men are wimps, boring and for most of the part not good looking…so there it is…I was put in my place. So these guys for the moist part get away with things that women hate, but they love the men that do them…it’s not after maybe something serious to happen or maybe is it because old age creeps upon these women and most bad boys won’t be giving them a second look…so what’s left, the nice guy. I don’t know, my thing is I am impressed at what many men get away with and the women that put up with their crap.

And to think that these bad boys are having kids…and raising them…heck maybe most don’t, but the women keep hooking up with these men and the example is passed on to the boys or girls that are brought up in that environment…the cycle never seems to end. You know I am far from perfect, but my kids are taught how to approach things in life, deal with issues, obstacles, and life in general…we all have access to information on dealing with all sorts of things, teaching your child(ren) properly so that they become a better contributor to society should be a top priority for all parents. We want them to succeed where we couldn’t, we want to provide them with the tools we didn’t have, we want them to have the things we didn’t have, we want them to become doctors, lawyers, or own their own business and even run for President…these are the things we try to implement to them and maybe hope that somewhere in all of it they become just a little better than us.

But as long as there are bad boys out there and the women that love them, even the other way around, I think we will always see parents blasting other kids and not recognizing that maybe their child(ren) is one of them or simply giving that problem child an opportunity to surpass their issues…everyone deserves a chance. All we need to give it to them and those around us. Yes, I know there will always be bad folks out there…but don’t you think if you have the chance to make one child, your better, that it will eventually help our community? I think it is possible…as for the women that love them bad boys, maybe you need to find a nice boy and tell him what you want…you might be surprised that they don’t mind taking requests to satisfy that woman…it eventually will satisfy them…win-win situation.

As for you guys – step back and instead of criticizing others, maybe you need to restate your words and find out what can be done to correct it…you can still be the bad boy, but with some actual common sense added in there for good measure.

Thanks for reading, till next time Latino Man signing Off.

Should a Man Tell a Woman She’s Fat?

I was driving into work this morning and I caught this topic on the radio, and actually the full topic was:

"Should a Man Tell a Woman if she is Fat? How should a man tell a woman? Does a woman want to know it?"

So I was driving and I wanted to hear the answers…so after several songs and mixes…yah…I was surprise to have that many songs played in the morning…wow…usually it’s a lot of talking…anyways…so the first caller gets on the line and she says, “Its funny you guys, meaning the radio show hosts, brought up this topic…you see my husband a few days ago told that he remembered when I was “Smaller”, that is the word he used…and now well…you look “Bigger”. He also said, “he was a sex addict when they first met and when we married and you started gaining weight I toned it down…you know the whole marriage thing…but now…well…you are ‘Bigger’ that’s what the husband told her”. So the women on the radio tells the radio hosts, he has to be kidding, he is the one to talk and the guy is bald, huge beer belly and them chicken legs he has…well…of course the woman was upset and that started a huge fight with her husband.

So the Radio host, comments on the caller…and her chicken legs husband, he says, “He needs to look in the mirror first before even touching the subject about you, the wife. Guy can’t tell a woman (wife, partner, girlfriend) she is fat if he’s fat….boy needs to hit the gym and look in the mirror before touching that subject with you, the wife.” Now I have to agree with that comment…but still no answer on whether a woman wants to hear that.

So that was one, then a next caller, woman told her story, you see she said, “I am from Atlanta and we are raised on Corn bread and good old home cooking and I use to hang out with this guy, do you know what this guy told me out of the blue one day while we were hanging out by the beach, “Girl you look like the sand…your all over…of course she doesn’t hang out with him anymore.

Now, they comment on the second caller, the hosts says, “There is definitely no need to use hard words, words that could hurt, so definitely that’s not the way to tell a woman she is fat or on the heavy side and if a man uses hurtful words…then he has some issues that he needs to go take care of”, that’s what the radio hosts says to the woman.

So, the thing is I never got to hear a woman’s opinion if a man should tell her she is gaining some weight, or if she even wants to hear it and if she does, how should a man touch on the subject? So…what do you think…ladies or gentlemen? I want to hear from you.

Should a Man Tell a Woman if she is Fat? How should a man tell a woman? Does a woman want to know it?

Thanks for reading and I look forward to any comments on this subject and please come back often Take care and hang in there.