Today blog is probably going to sound like a complaint…but please don’t take it the wrong way, because seriously I have to just put this down on paper…sort of speaking. This whole topic on marriage, relationships and yah sex…it's bananas…it’s incredible…and yet the same thing happens on and on and on…couple after couple, marriage after marriage…ok….sorry.
Ok, here it is…so, the other night a few days before this post…I was sitting in the family room with my wife (significant other)…and I say it that way because it is that way…anyways. So I was flipping through the channels…now under stand this is a rarity for us…actually sitting down in the same room….well I was flipping through the channels and sure enough on HBO there was a series on called “Real Sex”. I have seen a few episodes…nothing big…but that episode talked about women and how they can get back that loving feeling, if you know what I mean. These women had issues with sex in there relationships meaning they no longer wanted to have…and when they did it was more to them an obligation than something they enjoyed.
So, this therapist was showing/illustrating techniques on what a women could do to get back that mood while have intercourse, well a few of the women on the show really did not look like they were enjoying themselves at all. There were toys, lubricant, etc. but when the therapist was demonstrating on a volunteer…the women looked like well…her face looked like well…what’s the big deal…no enjoyment. Well about 2 minutes had gone by when all of sounded I heard echo through the room…”Gross, that’s sick”…so of course at that cue I changed the channel. Ok, your probably saying to yourself…yah typical man…why should I blame the women for not wanting to see that…good for her…yada…yada…yada. Why should a woman have to see such disturbing things…well it really wasn’t that bad, but lets just say for the sake of things it was.
Now, here is my beef…why is it that when a women gets older, has children they all of a sudden loose interest…now wait…of course they are married. Ok…Ok…don’t get all bent out of shape…your probably yelling at me saying it could be a number of things, self esteem, menopause, etc…etc…etc. But this is what eats me…when we first met…there wasn’t a time that she wouldn’t see me and would undress me and we would go at it…and then of course she talked about her exes and the things they did, where they did it, how they did it…hey I have an open mind…I like to know what a women likes… anyhow…and these things turned her on before…but today it grosses her out.
Now, wait…before I got married…I have met women that were older…let's just say over 40…and they had kids, been through a divorce and let me tell you…these women new and enjoyed sex very much and did things that well…probably didn’t do with their husbands’ or maybe they did (if they did…those guys are idiots) So there is my thing…do women loose interest in their husband…is it possible that women no longer finds their husband attractive. Because I have to say…that most men…if given the chance… would take sex anytime they could…you know that…lets not say that’s not true guys…if a guy has a women in front her in lingerie, big shirt or whatever and she starts the seduction…come on guys…you know before you know it…your down to your socks. Now, ok I am not putting the blame on women alone…it does happen to men to of course…- but what makes this change -.
Obviously you married the person because you thought they were sexy or gorgeous, handsome, intelligent, funny and when they came over to visit…your stomach would get all filled up with butterflies…so what happens after getting married or being in a relationship so long. My biggest question is…if anyone gets married…they should look back at the time before they got married and remember those incredible moments they had…the crazy things they did, the enjoyment of the first time…I mean yah your life changes when you get married, yah your life changes when you have kids, but your life doesn’t really change…it grows into something better…I think couples should still enjoy themselves…make time for themselves…behind close doors let the inhibitions go…just as you did when you first met. Marriage and kids should not make you life worse…getting married and having kids is just icing on that cake…that cake that you both kneaded, molded and baked during your dating years. it's not always about they kids…yah they are your life, you have a responsibility to your kids, but if you don’t take care of your marriage or relationship…you won’t be able to take care of your family or your kids and then what.
My Perspective:
You know I am probably starting to sound like a broken record, but it is all about the communication…people need to talk. But now that I am writing this again…I come to realize that the majority of the population doesn’t know how to communicate…they can’t express their feelings, their thoughts and well…that just makes things so much more difficult. All I have to say to this is…I wish I knew what makes a man or women loose interest in sex/intimacy with their significant other…and if you look closely at the statistics…this normally only happens during a marriage or a long term relationship. Maybe…it is time to move forward…move on…I am so sure that there is someone out there that will connect with you…and things will be ok.
It's time to tie up loose ends, prepare for the inevitable and move on…because your happiness is first and foremost, because if you are not happy…then you can’t make your love one happy or your children and that only continues the cycle…move out, move on…you’ll see that your happiness…even away from your kids, if you have them, will make the difference in their lives and yours.
Thanks for listening, hope to see some comments…till next time...be happy.
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