Marriage and Relationships – More on the Subject

Welcome back to another post entry…before I start…I wanted to mention to please come back often as I am working on posting Podcasts…I will be traveling around town and interviewing people on such topics as relationships, finance, business, and well other things. I think getting the scoop straight from the streets will be something worth the while…it will be interesting to say the least.

Ok, well I get to touch on the “Marriage and Sex” topic I posted a while back…I am always looking to see what others think and most importantly say about some of the topics I have and I was able to catch this real life experience.

So I was listening to a couple and on a talk show…no not the Jerry Springer show…lol. But any how…the topic was about sex after marriage or there the lack of. The first couple laid out there story…and of course it always starts of the same…the y meet…they fell in love…the sex was great…and constant…maybe 2 or 3 times a day. They get married and “BAM”…it goes out the window. Now, this couple was interesting because in this case the man was complaining on how much his wife wanted to do the thing, he said, “I would come from work and before we even said 1-word she was already taking of my pants”. He mentioned that he came home from work and was tired and was looking forward to a hot meal…which wasn’t prepared (not that it should be).and then she wanted to use toys, do it in not-so-discrete places…such as the beach. She said that one of her fantasies was to do it on the beach with lots of people around…wow. So the host asks the man…how many times a day should they do it…he said,”3 times week”. Now here is the funny part…the host and the audience bashed the guy for not wanting it more…and then told the wife…she better get more batteries for her toys…since it was going to be a long night…poor guy…he was being bashed on not wanting to do it more with his wife…absurd…huh…yah right.

Ok…now…the next couple comes on…total opposite. The husband wants it every night and the wife says…she thinks maybe twice a week should be enough. Now the thing is the host and the audience condemned the husband on being a sex addict….go figure. One guy gets hammered for not wanting enough and the other guy for wanting it too much. I was totally taken by that, as I was watching I said to myself…maybe the couple should switch…lol…ok…not nice…but do you see what I see…I don’t know maybe since I am a guy…I could be looking into this the wrong way…but come on.

So that topic has been on my mind, so why is it that men or woman loose interest in having sex with their significant other. I mean I know there are many variable, like children, careers, and maybe a myriad of other things…but I see as…if you both enjoyed the sex before marriage why should it change…I mean two consenting adults…smart…should know balance in their life will make a marriage work. If you put more weight on one thing…that could lead to a problem. I think couples need to make time for each other…maybe a date night…alone time…no TV…no Games…glass of wine, a cold beer or what ever fancy them…and afterwards have some passionate sex….I don’t know…I could be just blowing smoke…and I know that sex isn’t everything…really I do…but that’s it…what if a couple met, and they really didn’t do much in the bedroom…maybe once a week…but you see…they consented to that lifestyle…they got married and no changes…that’s where I am coming from. It’s weird but you get couples that either the man likes it too much or it’s the woman who likes it too much and they are paired up with the complete opposite. Now, that I am thinking about it…I think that is a subject that should be discussed before marriage…so that there is a clear understanding of where the subject on sex stands between the couple. I am not saying that sex should be the reason behind a relationship…but seriously it is a topic that has broken up marriages, relationships for decades and it happened before and it is happening now.

My Perspective:
Marriage is between two people that love and cherish each other…everything about that person should be the thing you love, being with them, hugging, kissing, their values, their self being…I mean it is for ever…or at least it should be…so why not make sure that everything about that person, their habits, their hands…I mean everything you should love…enjoying each other is important…that will bring closeness and comfort to the relationship. I mean do you remember the first time you guys did it…it was amazing…it should be that way all the time…and if it starts to move away from that…talk…get it back on track…it might take some toys, some role playing…nothing out of the ordinary (I would think)…but things that you both agree on. Don’t let that passion go…yah money can’t buy happiness or money is noteverything…but is sure makes life pleasant…the same with sex…it’s not everything…but boy does it make life pleasant. So grab your significant other and go out on a date, send the kids to there grandparents, ask your roommate to spend the night somewhere else…or if all that fails rent a hotel room…but make the time…I know…it will make you both feel close again.

Now, if you are absolutely in a bad relationship…I think its time to move on…believe me its not worth it…there are so many people out there looking as you are…time heals wounds…time will be on your side…you will find that one right person. I know there is not a Mr. right or Ms. right…but darn it…if you don’t try and look and talk before taking the plunge…I mean think about it…it’s the rest of your life that you are talking about and it should be spent happy…well for the most part of.

Well, enough about that for now, I look forward to your comments and I will touch again on this subject. So many aspects of a relationship…it all has to balance and don’t tell me it can’t…we are unique creatures and we have flown to the moon, gone to the deepest part of the ocean…I think we can make a relationship work…if we put some effort into it.

Thanks for reading and see you soon

Gamers; MMORPG – Massively Multiplayer Online Role-Playing Game

Here is a post for all you Online Gamers…you know who you are…World of Warcraft, Everquest, Lord of the Rings, Vanguard…well the list can go on. I guess I have to say that gaming has risen to a whole new level…I mean I recall back in the day when I would head on over to a friends house to do some gaming…Dungeons and Dragons (D&D) was the game back in the day and let me tell you it was FUN. Ok…I know many still do D&D…its just that once my old dungeon master stop playing…I tried someone else and well it wasn’t the same.

Now with all these online games existing on the internet…and the capability of playing with someone ½ way around the world…I guess that makes it really exciting. I have to admit on one thing…I do play ever so often…Everquest II. Now, its funny how I started with this game and I honestly, if anyone told me 10 years ago that I would be playing an online game…I would have just laughed. And at my age…hey I would have laughed harder.

Anyhow, here is the story. I had been married for 8 years…and well things were not going all that well…I guess it happens in a lot of marriages. Ok so, in 2005 my significant other started up on playing Billiards on yahoo…I mean she got so good that she was ranking extremely high…if I recall you had a number associated with you and the bigger the number the better player you were. Anyhow, she would play for hours…ok let me back up a bit…we have a son…and as soon as he was in bed…7:30 or 8:00pm it was of to billiard land and nothing else matter. Ok…so my thing is I got married because I would think as being married you would have someone to talk to, dream with, be with, laugh with, plan with…well you know…I didn’t think that marriage would eventually lead to the same feeling as having a roommate…oi. Anyhow, so that was our relationship…if you want to call it that. I of course could have joined in her gaming, but honestly…I would rather play billiard in real life with a pitcher of beer, hot wings, music and my significant other…but that was not happening in my household. Ok, so I started working at a new place….and long story short…I worked with a group of people that were nerds, computer geeks...well maybe not geeks, anyhow…they were about to engage in a new game, at that time, called Everquest II. I of course was new and didn’t get too involved or better said, I really did not know anyone…ok…they asked me if I wanted to play with them. I had no clue on what it meant, so here is a brief summary: Everquest II, as many other MMORPG games is a online make believe world where you get to create a character that you build and choose from the many races, humans, Ogres, etc. and a profession such as Wizard, Knight, etc. to play with in this make believe world. You do adventures, quests, you get a house, clothing, armor, accessories and well…it’s pretty much a make believe world where you interact with the environment and you get to interact with other players (individuals).

Ok, so I said to myself why not…hey my significant other is immersed in her game, why not start something I might like…so I did. Of course I told her and she just kind of brushed it off and said, “Cool”. So I was playing for about a month and she would ever so often look over to my screen and see what I was doing…she asked me questions on who that character was…what was I doing…and later she was amazed that I was playing with someone that was living in England. Well, she asked if she could try…well…I said sure…so she made a character…and away she went…she really liked it…so eventually we got her an account and transferred her character to her account and computer…she began playing. It was fun and dandy the first several months sense we were actually doing something together, but honestly I can’t be sitting on my butt for hours…I mean we had other obligations that were beginning to be neglected…and well I liked the game and all, but I would rather sit and have a beer, glass of wine or a hot coco and chat with my significant other…ok…ok…I am not being a pansy…but come on…if this is the case…I might as well stayed with my roommate…ok…ok. Well...you know what I mean…lol. So that was back in November of 2005…we are now in March of 2009…and we have another addition to the family…and the gaming continues…but now she runs her own guild and she has become a popular character with many…many other characters…they look for her to help out with quests, etc. Funny thing is…there are actual websites out there for woman against MMORPG games…in these sites there are stories about how woman hate the games and how those games broke up their marriage, because their husbands would play hours on end…I mean one story said her husband quit his job and only played…wow…I was amazed.

Any how, I guess I am only venting here…but I think that if you get into a marriage…whether you are a health nut, a gamer, a gardening fanatic…I think you need to make sure that you both enjoy each others company away from those things to be together and I am not saying you should forget or give up the things you like to do, but don’t let them strain your marriage or relationship…find a balance and remember you got married or are in a relationship because you enjoy being with them, their conversation, holding their hand, talking about everything and anything.

Thanks for listening and come back again…maybe you will get a good laugh or maybe you could relate…any and all comments are welcomed.

“Love, Peace and Chicken Grease”…as a friend use to say to me…LOL,

Celebrities – Above the Law

This has been a hot topic in the news…Chris Brown and Rihanna it seems Chris has been charged on two counts, now the question is…will he serve time?

For many…many years we have heard of cases against Celebrities from assault, fraud, and even murder that have been charged, but very seldom do they ever do anytime in prison…some even get out of community services…so where does the line get drawn on that type of power or money. I mean you know and I know if that was me or you we would b behind bars, and depending on the accusation…probably be in prison for a very long time…or like I said depending on the crime…we would be doing community services for years…I don’t know…its hard to touch on the subject…and to try and give an opinion well…sometimes …well you know what I mean. The allegations are as follows:

Chris Brown allegedly tried to push Rihanna out of the car he was driving, slammed her head against the car window, and punched her. He also, allegedly, said, “I’m going to beat the —-- out of you when we get home.” When Rihanna was able to call and leave a message for her assistant (telling her to call the police), Brown supposedly said, “You just did the stupidest thing ever. I’m going to kill you.”

I guess if you or I were in their position, not that it makes it right, just saying if you or I were in their position and we had the money they posses…I know that money, unfortunately, talks and those expensive lawyers always…always find loop-holes in our judicial system. Now, does it make it right for them to get away with things? What about the million of individuals out there that need to steal to feed there family…I mean that’s not an excuse, but where do we draw the line on who should follow the laws and regulation of this country or any country. The thing is I was listening to the radio and so many opinions on the Chris and Rihanna issue, many of the callers kept saying that they believe Chris will not do time or even see the inside of a jail cell. Many callers also voiced about woman’s rights and how woman have changed their view about themselves over the last decade…it seems many woman have lots the self respect, self independence about them…so now its ok for these things to happen, because it happens to everyone else…ok…hey that’s what the callers were saying.

So whether you agree or disagree…I think that no one…and I mean no one should have to put up with abuse…and even if everyone in the world is doing it…it’s time to let everyone else continue on, but you need to change your life. If you are in an abusive relationship…get some help…don’t wait…and if your significant other promises to change…them let them…but you need to get out…and once they has changed…and I mean really…not a 2-week anger management course either…but really changed…then start dating again…start fresh don’t just jump back in right away…and then get caught up in the web again…if they changed and care…they will wait and start all over again to try and win your affection and most importantly your trust.

Visit www.ndvh.org a site dedicated to assist those in a domestic violent relationship…take the first step.

So back to Chris and Rihanna topic, do you think Chris will do any time in prison? How many of you think he will:

· Serve prison time,
· Do community services,
· Pay a fine and walk away,
· Get the charges dropped.

I appreciate you stopping by and please come back often I look forward to your responses on this topic. Take care and be safe.