A Latinos Blog

Office “Wife” or “Husband”



You know I think this topic has to be extremely common and one that I am certain others are going through or have gone through. You see many of us work in an office environment or restaurant or anywhere that we would intermingle with people. Now, since we spent a very large amount of our day at work it is very common that we end up with some close friends or at it is commonly known as, Work Husband” or “Work Wife”. These are people that well act like your spouses but are not really married and most of the time it is done out of fun.

These individuals usually just give you crap but when you think about it, sometimes they borrow money, a buck here a buck there or when happy hours come along you buy them a drink or share in your appetizers. The biggest thing is sometimes these types of relationships go a bit beyond and we end up sharing intimate things with them that we use to share with our spouses but no longer do. On many occasions these types of harmless acting can lead to some kind of relationship that could well you get my point.

The thing is I ask myself why does this happen? Is it that marriage or relationships become monotone…for a better word? I mean when you first meet someone there was that extreme chemistry, lust, attraction and well it seemed that you were both meant to be, so then why after say 5-7 years does it become monotone? I am not making excuses I am trying to see why things like this happen and if we see the signs, why doesn’t anyone of the two try and change things.Well wait…let me rephrase that. There is always one in a relationship that tries and makes things better, but it takes the both of you to make it work. So why let it go there. Is it possible that the one that does not try…simply not interested anymore and doesn’t know how to tell the other and well waits for something crazy and stupid for the other to do…it sort of sounds like the one that doesn’t care anymore simply washing there hands to the relationship.

I don’t know, but the reason I am bringing this up is well…I have been in this company for nearly 7 years, now I am married…times are tough but I am sure I am not the only one. The thing is…and I say this liberally…there is a woman at work that as funny as it sounds…I like her voice. Now, to say the least, she is very pretty…cute pretty and she seems to be a down to earth fun person. Someone you can joke with, and probably a woman that you can sit with and watch a sport and have a cold one. Now, I don’t really talk to her, its one of those hi and bye things, but once in a while we chat a little. She is married and has two children, like me…and when exchange pleasantries about our children…nothing more. But, the thing is lately and I am not the only one to notice…she has begun dressing very nice…very eye catching…nice…you know what I mean guys and some ladies. And well…I think she is hot…straight up.

Now, like I said she is married and so am I, but what happens with other people that maybe fall in this area…they sometimes pursue the relationship and well things happen…but why. Shouldn’t people in relationships tell the other that they are done trying and they need to move on…before being infidel? Why leave a relationship as the bad person, because the excuse that she or he made me do it…well doesn’t cut it. So why not break it off clean and move one clean?

So, how many relationships start in the office, probably a lot more than anyone knows and how many of those new relationships break up other relationships? Sometimes I wonder if the cycle continues with those new relationships…scary. Well…I wanted to bring this up because I hoping to see if get any comments regarding this post. I wanted to bring this up because I was thinking about that women in my office….she started to dress very nice…is that a sign that maybe her marriage is on the rocks? I don’t know but with my experience and what I hear and see…it surely does.

So, if we all know that these types of things could happen in a relationship…then why do we let it get to that point? My theory is that there are two kinds of people in a relationship, the one that move the relationship and the one that follows. Usually the one that follows gets bored and wishes to move on but has no clue on how to communicate that to their significant other. So, two things happen. The one that move the relationship ends up doing something stupid or the one that doesn’t do a thing just lives with it. Then two things could happen with that relationship, either it is a bad break up (sometimes good) or the relationship remains and drags on till death do them apart.

My Perspective:

Communication is the most important thing in a relationship…for those that can communicate…you might have to do it for the both of you, but do it. Don’t end up doing something stupid that you might regret…a few simple words can make things better, maybe not right away but I can truly believe that taking the time to talk and break it off will eliminate a huge headache or pain that could last longer than the words. So if your significant other doesn’t talk and the signs are there…do you and the other a favor…talk? Now, I know times are tough and trying to start fresh on your own, specially with kids can be a financial obstacle, but if you see the signs, start saving money on the side and prepare your self…you can do it yah maybe you won’t have that 50 inch TV or nice back yard to BBQ, but you’ll be a better person for it and so will your significant other…not to mention any kids that maybe involved because believe me they know when mom & dad are not getting along…they maybe young and inexperience, but love is love and when it is not there…they know it.

Thanks for reading and till next time…remember communication is it. Latino Man signing off.